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Briony’s Radio Adelaide Interview

Catch your partner doing something right! Briony introduces Gottman Method Couples Therapy in her Radio Adelaide Interview with Nicki O'Brien.

Most couples find it easy to point the finger when they think their partner is doing something wrong.  In this Radio Adelaide Interview Briony explains the power of telling your partner what you like about what they do. A habit of focussing on the negative can be hard to break, so therapy may help. During couples therapy Briony focuses on both:

  • what's not working in your relationship, and also
  • what is working.

Identifying strengths to build upon is just as important as finding problem areas. Briony uses the Gottman Method of Couples Therapy because it is positively oriented. It helps couples find positive connection points that get buried under distress or conflict. There’s often so much love beneath everything else — and lots more to discover about each other.  John and Julie Gottman revolutionized relationship counselling by focussing on the positives.  Four decades of scientific research make the Gottman Method a highly effective couples therapy.

The four horsemen of the relationship apocalypse

Using the Gottman Method, Briony teaches couples about common destructive behaviours in an easily understandale way. The big four are known as the “Four horsemen of the relationship apocalypse” and include:

  • Criticism - making negative comments about your partner as a person rather than focussing on behaviour.
  • Contempt - treating your partner with disrespect, sarcasm and condescension.
  • Defensiveness - self protection from a perceived attack by playing the victim or using righteous indignation.
  • Stonewalling - where a partner will withdraw during a discussion, closing themselves off from the conversation.

During therapy, couples learn to catch their partner doing something positive and tell them about it!  Briony also teaches you how to catch yourself doing things that don’t contribute to the kind of relationship you want. Once couples see themselves engaging in those behaviours, they start to see their role in relationship difficulties more clearly. This opens the way for improvements that make your relationship much more satisfying.

In this interview with Radio Adelaide Briony introduces the Gottman Method of Couples Therapy and how it is used.

Listen to Briony's Radio Adelaide Interview

Resources from the interview

John Gottman – Making Relationships Work – Youtube  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLXX8wzvT7c
The Gottman Institute – https://www.gottman.com/
Radio Adelaide – http://www.radioadelaide.org.au/

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